Today was the last day of exams!! Had a great day until I came home :( Life sucks! It's like they never try to understand me, or stand in my shoes and see how my work is like. I know that they are also stressful, busy, coping with their own troubles, but how about me? I am also facing the same, maybe about different matters, but I still have my own difficulties with life. And I know it's my fault, my fault for not clarifying to you what you meant, for doing the stupid stuff, for doing everything quickly so I can use the laptop. But do you have to make me feel like a retard? You guys DON'T TELL ME ANYTHING AT ALL. How am I supposed to know what to do?! I am not Ms. Know Everything. It's just so frustrating, that you guys assume I know everything when I don't. For pushing all the blame to me. Shouldn't you also shoulder some responsibility? Shouldn't you guys stop THROWING TO ME EVERYTHING just because I am the eldest? I know I am, I should blah,blah,blah... But I am no Wonder Woman, or Superman. I am just a normal teenage girl, who is struggling with life, with extra burden to carry, with no one helping and giving me clear instructions. I get lost too. I need help too. I need a time for my own where nobody bothers me. Can't I be selfish for once? Can't you let me enjoy my free time after I have just finished my exams? I know that stuff that should have been done while I was having exams are being accumulated and left aside, but someone else can do it too. I am not in this alone.
I need someone to guide me. I need someone to help me. I need a breather from all of this crap. Do you know I hate going back, where everything is like a drama? Do you know I put on a bloody facade everyday, pretending things are okay when they are really not? When I am out with my friends, i try to forget everything and just have fun. Can't you let me do that?
Now, my alone time, is when everybody is asleep.
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